Ways to Nurture People with Patience

Would be nice to get to a place where I don't notice all the pain and suffering around me so much. We struggle to be successful, we struggle to be fine and then we find ourselves angry again that we can't express how we feel, then judge YOU don't understand feelings like I do. We want to love each other anyway, and say we do cause we are family. To me, it is just like being nice to someone at work, cause they are a fellow employee, not because you'd really like to have a relationship with them.

Taking a quick walk around the block will clear my head. My kids and I do the best we can to keep in touch, I am not as critical of them. Maybe I feel stupid for telling her anything, cause she doesn't seem to remember or care, it is just her way, no matter how often I have told her, "Listen, Mom, I am tired of asking you to quit picking on us like that, it hurts my feelings, it isn't funny, I don't care what you say, calling me a big baby, saying I am pouting about nothing, well, I don't see it that way." To love you the way I want to, means I can't be around you that much, and that makes me sad.

The sun still shines every day, I still have a job, and probably always will in some way. Still have a wonderful husband, what a good man in my life who loves me true. If he was writing this instead of me, I am sure he could find quite a few pet peeves, so I try not to get after him about little things, and I try pleasant with reminders of fixing the truck and such, I have learned the hard way, yelling and screaming just builds walls of resentment. Maybe the anger at mother is that deep rooted, a big yeller and screamer she was in our younger day. We try real hard in our relationship with each other and our kids anyway not to do it much.

I give him reminders about the truck, not because I am tired of putting water in the radiator everyday, but neither of us would like it very much if I broke down out on the highway somewhere. I truly don't like that I don't feel safe taking it on the long drives I am use to. Old feelings of being stuck in a cage try to resurface. Maybe there is something to it, the way I used those words, if I am still burying my feelings, I am not letting them go, am I?

Probably why I walk away from many work relationships, because I can for one thing. Don't have to put up with people who don't want to change. Business relationships have it the hardest, they want things done a certain way, can be very controlling and want people to change, hard to find people they can get to just do it their way, peacefully.

As far as my truck is concerned I will ask my husband gently if I need to take it to a garage somewhere since I know he has more than enough work to do. He admits, sometimes he just forgets, that use to really jerk my chain. "What, you forget about me and what I need? Ha, how often do I remember what he needs? Glad we don't speak in anger of such things. I can trust him, in due time he always takes care of our needs.

Lord, give me patience.

"We are becoming more nurturing." This I believe. Especially of others.

"Take a hot bubble bath, at least once a week, lay out in the sun all afternoon, go for a drive without buying anything, go for a long walk, take some hot tea to a friend." The reward for attention is healing.

"Some of us are so use to constant change, we are uncomfortable with just settling in, wearing same styles of things, going same way, same hair styles, same home, year after year."

The fire in some of our bellies scream for change constantly. How to fill that kind of need? Acceptance of all the days blessings is a start.

Light a candle, go to sleep without the tv on, just listening to the rain.

Low and behold, hubby just came home, guess what he told me? Yep, truck is getting fixed tonight, Rex is on his way over with his mechanical friend Ray, they'll have it done before dinner, hint, hint. I don't understand why he stays here for dinner so much, Lucy is a wonderful cook, the girls keep her really busy though and he insists she takes a break from doing all the housework too. I am so excited my truck will be fixed, then I won't have to disappoint Sis, who wants to take the long drive up to Brisbane, visiting her children. Made my day!